December 3, 2013

[Virtual Jarmo]

SJ 3 - TOR 2
Shots: 28-19 SJ
PP: SJ - 1/6; TOR - 1/2

01:39 1-0 TOR Martin Hanzal [6] (Taylor Hall, Scott Mayfield)
10:49 1-1 SJ Derek Forbort [3] (Alexander Radulov, Andrew Cogliano)PP
19:07 2-1 TOR Chad Kolarik [10])PP
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no scoring
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55:29 2-2 SJ Alexander Radulov [13] (Keith Ballard, Oscar Klefbom)
58:35 2-3 SJ Ivan Telegin [10] (Joe Thornton, Andrew Cogliano)
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Three stars:
1st: Alexander Radulov
2nd: Ivan Telegin
3rd: Andrew Cogliano

Farm: Worcester 3 - Toronto 2

NYI 2 - PIT 0
Shots: 31-16 PIT
PP: NYI - 2/4; PIT - 0/6

08:07 1-0 NYI Jonathan Tavares [9] (Josh Birkholz, Ed Jovanovski)PP
16:32 2-0 NYI Rick Nash [18] (Josh Birkholz)PP
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no scoring
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no scoring
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Three stars:
1st: Braden Holtby
2nd: Rick Nash
3rd: Jonathan Tavares

Farm: Bridgeport 2 - WBS 1

WSH 3 - CAR 2
Shots: 26-23 CAR
PP: WSH - 2/6; CAR - 2/6

07:53 1-0 WSH Cam Barker [4] (Morgan Rielly, Wojtek Wolski)PP
12:26 1-1 CAR Eric Staal [13] (Mikko Koivu, Jamie McBain)PP
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32:24 2-1 WSH Olli Jokinen [8] (Pavel Datsyuk, Andrei Markov)
35:13 3-1 WSH Vladimir Tarasenko [10] (Zach Parisé, Pavel Datsyuk)PP
39:59 3-2 CAR Dustin Penner [9] (Teemu Pulkkinen, Bohumil Jank)PP
------------------------------------------------------------
no scoring
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Three stars:
1st: Cam Barker
2nd: Vlad Tarasenko
3rd: Pavel Datsyuk

Farm: Hershey 6 - Charlotte 4

CBJ 4 - TB 3 (SO)
Shots: 31-27 TB
PP: CBJ - 1/2; TB - 0/2

09:27 0-1 TB Jakub Voracek [13] (Tyler Seguin, Peter Olvecky)
10:46 0-2 TB Ryan Kesler [10] (Dalton Smith)
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26:58 1-2 CBS Brendan Gaunce [2] (Daniel Krejci, Connor Murphy)
32:51 2-2 CBS Phillip Danault [14] (Mike Forney, Daymond Langkow)PP
34:43 3-2 CBS Ryan Stoa [7] (Derick Brassard, Brendan Gaunce)
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42:58 3-3 TB Ryan Murray [3] (Ryan Kesler, Marco Sturm)
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no scoring
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Shootout
--------
Columbus Blue Jackets win 2-1
Columbus Blue Jackets - Mike Forney, goal; John Moore, goal; Joonas Donskoi, miss;
Tampa Bay Lightning - Tyler Seguin, miss; Cam Fowler, goal; Brent Burns, miss;

Three stars:
1st: Ryan Kesler
2nd: Brendan Gaunce
3rd: Marco Sturm

Farm: Syracuse 5 - Springfield 3

OTT 4 - FLA 1
Shots: 29-15 OTT
PP: OTT - 0/4; FLA - 0/2

11:17 0-1 OTT Nazem Kadri [15] (Brian Lee)
15:44 0-2 OTT Ryan Martindale [3] (Daniil Zharkov, Matt Greene)
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32:41 0-3 OTT Calle Jarnkrok [6] (Mika Zibanejad, Matt Greene)
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42:12 0-4 OTT Ryan Martindale [4] (Anton Volchenkov, Otso Rantakari)
59:07 1-4 FLA Paul Kariya [5] (Colby Robak, Sheldon Souray)
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Three stars:
1st: Ryan Martindale
2nd: Nazem Kadri
3rd: Mika Zibanejad

Farm: Binghamton 3 - SA 2

CHI 7 - DAL 1
Shots: 30-29 CHI
PP: CHI - 0/6; DAL - 0/3

02:09 1-0 CHI Eric Fehr [3] (Kyle Turris)
10:12 2-0 CHI Jonathan Toews [16] (Petr Straka)
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22:33 3-0 CHI Ben Eager [4] (Niklas Hjalmarsson)
26:33 3-1 DAL Ryan Callahan [3] (Luca Caputi, Mike Commodore)
29:24 4-1 CHI Brent Seabrook [4])
29:47 5-1 CHI Jonathan Toews [17] (Patrick Sharp)
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40:19 6-1 CHI Kyle Turris [7] (Eric Fehr)
42:26 7-1 CHI Kyle Turris [8] (Eric Fehr)
------------------------------------------------------------

Three stars:
1st: Kyle Turris
2nd: Jonathan Toews
3rd: Eric Fehr

Farm: Rockford 4 - Texas 3

NSH 6 - VAN 4
Shots: 26-25 NSH
PP: NSH - 0/1; VAN - 1/5

11:45 1-0 NAS Simon Gagné [17] (Ryan Ellis, Brendan Mikkelson)
13:37 2-0 NAS Sebastien Collberg [11] (Drew Miller, Anthony Stewart)
18:53 2-1 VAN Alex Plante [2] (Michael Frolík, Filip Forsberg)
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31:29 3-1 NAS Dwight King [2] (Duncan Siemens, Ryan Ellis)
34:42 3-2 VAN Michael Frolík [8] (Jordan Martinook, Chris Gratton)
35:26 4-2 NAS Sebastien Collberg [12] (Steven Shipley)
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46:12 4-3 VAN Rostislav Olesz [3] (Jordan Schroeder, Mike Cammalleri)PP
48:16 5-3 NAS Simon Gagné [18] (Shea Weber)
50:02 6-3 NAS Steven Shipley [7])
59:42 6-4 VAN Jordan Schroeder [8] (Kim Johnsson)
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Three stars:
1st: Sebastien Collberg
2nd: Steven Shipley
3rd: Simon Gagne

Farm: Utica 3 - Milwaukee 1

PHX 3 - EDM 2
Shots: 21-19 PHX
PP: PHX - 1/3; EDM - 1/1

12:06 1-0 EDM Brad Richards [12] (Toni Rajala, Alexander Frolov)PP
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27:44 1-1 PHO Ryan Stone [5] (Viktor Tikhonov, Tomas Kaberle)
34:24 2-1 EDM Jean-François Jacques [8])
------------------------------------------------------------
40:53 2-2 PHO Vladislav Kartayev [10] (Jordan Staal, Vladislav Namestnikov)PP
50:53 2-3 PHO Chris Brown [3] (Max Gardiner, Brian Sutherby)
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Three stars:
1st: Chris Brown
2nd: Vlad Kartayev
3rd: Ryan Stone

Farm: OKC 5 - Portland 3

LA 2 - ANA 1 (SO)
Shots: 29-16 ANA
PP: ANA - 0/1; LA - 0/1

no scoring
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35:45 0-1 LA Bernhard Keil [2] (Matthew Beattie, Andrew Ladd)
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43:39 1-1 ANA Patrik Berglund [3] (Logan MacMillan, Teuvo Teravainen)
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no scoring
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Shootout
--------
Los Angeles Kings win 2-0
Anaheim Mighty Ducks - Henrik Zetterberg, miss; Evander Kane, miss;
Los Angeles Kings - Sidney Crosby, goal; Jack Johnson, goal;

Three stars:
1st: Steve Mason
2nd: Andrew Ladd
3rd: Patrik Berglund

Farm: Manchester 8 - Norfolk 1

[Virtual Jarmo]

Fucking plug Rene Bourque will sit 12 games for taking Joonas Donskoi out for the rest of the 2013-14 season. Mirko Hoefflin gets one game for knocking out Brayden Coburn for a couple weeks.

I'm guessing Joonas Donskoi didn't score in the shootout because his other leg has been amputated. Fuck Rene Bourque. da Hawks rick roll somebody. Fuck Rene Bourque. Braden Holtby shuts out the Penguins because EHM makes no sense sometimes. Fuck Rene Bourque. The Leafs collapse in Leafs fashion. Fuck Rene Bourque. Chris Brown presumably beat somebody, stole the puck, and scored for the game winner for the Yotes. Fuck Rene Bourque. A spirited effort from the Ducks results in a shootout loss. Fuck Rene Bourque. Tim will have a cool .gif for us sometime tonight or tomorrow.

You know I'm still paying Rene Bourque? I'm going to take the 950k I saved by releasing him to hire a virtual hitman to cap him.

http://www.ehechockey.com/EHEC.zip

http://www.ehechockey.com/calendar.html

[TorontoGM]

You sons of bitches!

[Montreal Canadiens]

Fucking plug Rene Bourque will sit 12 games for taking Joonas Donskoi out for the rest of the 2013-14 season. Mirko Hoefflin gets one game for knocking out Brayden Coburn for a couple weeks.

I'm guessing Joonas Donskoi didn't score in the shootout because his other leg has been amputated. Fuck Rene Bourque. da Hawks rick roll somebody. Fuck Rene Bourque. Braden Holtby shuts out the Penguins because EHM makes no sense sometimes. Fuck Rene Bourque. The Leafs collapse in Leafs fashion. Fuck Rene Bourque. Chris Brown presumably beat somebody, stole the puck, and scored for the game winner for the Yotes. Fuck Rene Bourque. A spirited effort from the Ducks results in a shootout loss. Fuck Rene Bourque. Tim will have a cool .gif for us sometime tonight or tomorrow.

You know I'm still paying Rene Bourque? I'm going to take the 950k I saved by releasing him to hire a virtual hitman to cap him.

http://www.ehechockey.com/EHEC.zip

http://www.ehechockey.com/calendar.html

Rene Bourque's feelings on you are pretty clear now too.

If we use STL's train of thought, this must mean that NYI is a better team than PIT.

[Jets GM]

[10:47:57 PM] Adam B: I'm paying him 950k to injure Donskoi

[Montreal Canadiens]

Tampa Bay.....GOOOONS!!!!

I've said it before! when they are losing, they goooooon it up! They started my losing streak by knocking out Kos.

[Bruins_GM]

[SharksGM]

Holy shit, a backup goaltender with a win. Also nice to be on the right side of one of those 3rd period collapses.

Remember, Ivan Telegin owns.

[Parker]

Road win is good. Too bad we still can't kill a penalty.

Namestnikov seems to be adapting to Phoenix's physical style. 6 hits, +4 TA/GA ratio. That'll do. I also don't get how Ryan Stone is all of a sudden an offensive threat (I guess because SOMEONE has to score goals on my team) and Chris Brown is the hero of the day. Go 'Yotes?

EDIT: Pretty impressive debut for Logan Shaw, too. Good stuff.

[Femur]

better than watching da real Hawks last night. i swear every time i get to see them on tv, they lose. of course, it was a shooting gallery on Lehtenon, but alas

[Penguin]

LOL Rene Bourque my man good job!

Holtby shutout, really? Come on fuck im ordering new sticks for da boys!

[Montreal Canadiens]

LOL Rene Bourque my man good job!

Holtby shutout, really? Come on fuck im ordering new sticks for da boys!

I stole your old ones after the schlacking we got.

[CapsGM]

Fucking plug Rene Bourque will sit 12 games for taking Joonas Donskoi out for the rest of the 2013-14 season. Mirko Hoefflin gets one game for knocking out Brayden Coburn for a couple weeks.

I'm guessing Joonas Donskoi didn't score in the shootout because his other leg has been amputated. Fuck Rene Bourque. da Hawks rick roll somebody. Fuck Rene Bourque. Braden Holtby shuts out the Penguins because EHM makes no sense sometimes. Fuck Rene Bourque. The Leafs collapse in Leafs fashion. Fuck Rene Bourque. Chris Brown presumably beat somebody, stole the puck, and scored for the game winner for the Yotes. Fuck Rene Bourque. A spirited effort from the Ducks results in a shootout loss. Fuck Rene Bourque. Tim will have a cool .gif for us sometime tonight or tomorrow.

You know I'm still paying Rene Bourque? I'm going to take the 950k I saved by releasing him to hire a virtual hitman to cap him.

http://www.ehechockey.com/EHEC.zip

http://www.ehechockey.com/calendar.html

No gif today, but...



7-0 in the last nine games when scoring at least one PP goal, 0-2 when the powerplay fails to score.

PK is clueless though.

[Virtual Jarmo]

Did Quinn get married?

[Commish Bub(NYR)]

Did Quinn get married?

He hasn't asked me for MacKinnon in a couple weeks, so he must be somewhere else doing something.

[CapsGM]

Did Quinn get married?

Yes.

[Virtual Jarmo]

Did Quinn get married?

Yes.

The fuck.

I hate him. He needs to learn to answer a text.