In a rather shocking move, the Montreal Canadiens today announced the firing of GM/Coach Ty Boyko. The move comes after the Canadiens were unable to repeat as Cup champions, pathetically only getting to game 7 of the Cup finals and losing in OT.

"We feel he should have at least been able to lead them to a third overtime," said Habs owner Geoff Molson. "I mean, look at him. He's got loser tattooed on his forehead."

"My forehead is sponsored by Loser Toileteries," Boyko responded when asked about it as he packed up his desk, "it's not much, but it pays the bills. Well, one or two of them. The smaller bills. Like my drycleaning. Not that I do that much, since I mostly wear slogan t-shirts. Where IS the beef, anyway? Ha ha, get it? Hey, did you stop filming?"

Boyko was not out of work for long, though, as the Winnipeg Jets accidentally faxed him a contract offer. Boyko signed it before they could cancel the fax.
"My mom always told me: if you get a faxed contract offer from Winnipeg, sign it right away in case they didn't mean to send it. For 40 years I had no idea what she was talking about and figured it was the Bourbon, but now I get it. Thanks, Mom."
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